Wednesday, 24 March 2010

Where did my ‘normal’ life go to?

On Monday one of my 12 year old twin sons was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes. Not a long story – he’d been thirsty over the last couple of weeks, getting up in the night to pee, nothing else. My dad has Type 2 so we tested R’s blood – more out of curiosity than any real suspicion of diabetes. The normal level of glucose in blood should be around 4-7mmol/l, R’s was 30. He should have been feeling ill; he felt fine.  We tested him over the weekend and he had 25 and 20. The confirmation came at the local GP’s surgery where we were told that we’d already diagnosed it ourselves so we’d better get to the local hospital quickly.

And here we are.

He should be out tomorrow. We’ve seen doctors, nurses, specialist nurses and consultants. We’ll go on seeing them for the foreseeable future.

Right now it feels as if I’m underwater breathing somehow, but underwater. Everyone else, the rest of the world, are on firm dry land and I can’t quite seem to get my footing. I want desperately for this to become just a small aspect of our lives and not the main focus but I fear for a while at least, it will overtake us.

We’re incredibly fortunate to be surrounded by the love and support of family and wonderful friends – not least of whom is Patricia who also has a son with Type 1 and keeps the Waving and Drowning Blog which I’ve often glanced at BD (Before Diabetes) but now I’m scouring for hints, tips and the road map out of here.

Tuesday, 16 March 2010

Getting out and about

At the weekend I was down at Bedgebury Pinetum – P was going mountain biking on one of their excellent trails there, I usually join him but this time I wanted to write.

I took the long trail around the Pinetum. It is littered with benches and stopping places for taking in the beauty of the trees and landscape. I sat under a particularly large tree and began writing this….

 

It’s getting warmer finally and there are narcissus bulbs coming up amongst the rare trees. A duck is calling in the distance and sounds almost like a dog. There’s a constant background noise of birdsong – I think I can make out a thrush’s song but I suspect I’m simply telling myself that’s what a thrush sings. I can hear a light-aircraft but the patchy grey and white clouds stop me from seeing what sounds like aerobatics going on overhead. I wonder what the birds make of that? I know from watching my geese when I was at the farm that they stop and look skywards at the planes – I always imagined that the look was one of longing. Perhaps they think we’re foolish – although I doubt that they realise we humans are in the planes – maybe they see them as large predatory birds.

And now I can hear a baby crying – sounds like a toddler throwing a tantrum – really demanding bellowing. The sound carries just like the duck’s call for a mate. The baby is probably tired, cold and hungry.

In this country it seems we’re never far from other people.

Now I’m getting cold. Time to move on; the eventual walk back. Tea and a slice of cake.

 

I had intended to write more after this and after I’d arrived at the Pinetum’s cafe – this was my warm up writing where I shift my brain over from left logical to right writerly. Even just typing these lines up has done the shift and now I feel sort of … dreamy I suppose. Unfortunately I’ve got a class to plan now so I’d better get back into the logical left and maybe write later. I do think though that as a writer it’s important to know how to make that mental shift (I just typed ‘shirt’ first – what is my subconscious trying to tell me?!) and how to make it quickly. Stephen King suggests that all writers should read for around four hours every day and write for two. Wonderful advice if you can afford that amount of time. I aim at an hour or so reading and the same writing – I say aim because with jobs and a family sometimes both my writing and reading feels the squeeze and that’s why I escape every so often to places like the Pinetum – when I reached the cafe I read for an hour.

So, what’s this post about?

1.Find ways to make time for writing and reading.

2.To write from ‘cold’ just listen and look around you.

3.I think Spring is finally here!