Dinner Dates

It’s Friday afternoon and I should be looking forward to an action packed weekend….hmm….not really….

Tonight I’m out with Jo – she’s arranged for us to have dinner with the two chaps we had the drink with the other week after the Speed Dating. And while I’m sure it’ll be a pleasant evening and nice to share an intelligent conversation….hmmm….I don’t know….I’m not keen on going out with someone unless they entirely understand that this is only as friends – I don’t wish to lead these men on in any way, shape or form. So I don’t want them to end up feeling that they’ve wasted their time – but on the other hand, what’s wrong with going out for a pleasant evening, good company and Me? They’re onto a winner!

Tomorrow I had hoped to be out climbing in Tunbridge Wells again, but the guys I went with last week are all climbing on Sunday and I have to play rugby on Sunday – yes, I know that’s a bit of a shock – parents against coaches at my sons' rugby club…and even more shocking and slightly worrying is the fact that my ex is one of the coaches….it could get nasty…eeek! No, I’m sure it won’t get nasty - he’s a perfect gentleman (and he sometimes reads this blog…..). However, I have never played rugby in my life, hockey yes, but not rugby or football so it could be that come Monday I may not be able to move….

So tomorrow will find me at the indoor wall – which is still fun but just not anywhere near as much fun as climbing outside. Tomorrow evening Jo is having her housewarming dinner party – The Flatterer is going and is supposed to be bringing a friend. Hmm…why am I getting the feeling that Jo is beginning to attempt to set me up? Or maybe it’s just natural reticence. But I certainly don’t feel excited about meeting any of these men. I guess that’s only natural when one has been in a major long-term relationship and of course in no way reflects on the men – I don’t know them so it can’t reflect upon them. But getting “out there” just doesn’t feel terribly attractive at the moment unless it’s out there on a rock face.

Oh dear, a rather down and depressing entry I’m afraid. Maybe I’m scared. But I don’t feel scared of meeting men – I positively enjoy meeting new people and socialising. All of this though, just makes me feel awkward. I think maybe because it’s all a bit artificial – it is set up. And who knows, maybe there is also an element of jealousy on my part – Jo is the one who knows all these men from her Speed Dating escapades, and I’m used to being the one who talks to anyone and knows lots more people.

I have had suggestions put to me today that involve chatting up some random man in the bar where we’re due to meet and then disappearing with him for the evening….now while that may sound like quite an attractive proposition….chickening out and leaving Jo in the lurch isn’t my style at all. And I’m sure we’ll have a lovely evening – does it sound like I’m beginning to attempt to convince myself now?